Archive for November, 2006

20 things I did in November

Things that happened to me this month:

1. I had a job interview at a bank. I didn’t get the job.
2. I interviewed several different nannies.
3. I took Animal to his first dentist appointment ever, where I was told that the pacifier is the sole reason behind his insanely crooked smile.
4. I watched my kids make Pinewood derby cars, which failed miserably at the race.
5. I took Pigpen to Chuck E. Cheese for a birthday party and almost had a panic attack from being surrounded by hysterical little people.
6. I bought myself two pairs of jeans, both in a size too small. I fit in them now.
7. I stayed on Atkin’s Induction phase for 2 weeks, before I promptly removed myself when I started getting severe abdominal cramping that freaked me out.
8. I exercised about 10 times.
9. I lost 8 pounds.
10. I bought a crapload of cloth diapers. Somewhere around $200 worth.
11. I sold diapers, nowhere near the amount I spent.
12. I bought two new bras, in the wonderful size of 36D.
13. My littlest goddaughter had a birthday and I sent her a sweet little package by mail.
14. I switched from rum to whiskey.
15. I started watching the first season of the Sopranos and fell in lust.
16. I rededicated myself to my doula training, and signed up for Childbirth Ed.
17. I blogged every single day on two separate blogs.
18. I joined the Blog Exchange and the Housewife Mafia.
19. I rejoined and started fluttering again.
20. I tried DIY bikini line wax. (P.S., not a good idea.)


The best excuse ever

Last night, we sat down to a lovely dinner of garlic chicken, baked potatoes, and green beans.

Since Einstein has now decided to go vegetarian, he was sitting down to half of a baked potato and a nice big serving of green beans.

Usually, we eat canned green beans. They’re not great for you. Fresh is best, frozen is secondary. But we like the canned. They’re nice and soft and smooshy and salty. However, last night, we were eating frozen. (My Mom was serving and she has a thing against canned beans.)

Einstein took one bite of those bright green veggies and made quite the sour expression. He spent the rest of the meal whining and complaining about having to eat the green beans. Finally, I asked him to tell me exactly what he didn’t like about them. After all, we eat them quite regularly. What made them so different from the canned variety?

He thought for a minute, scrunched up his nose and said “They’re too….SQUEAKY.”

I was pretty impressed. Needless to say, the beans were scraped into the garbage. Einstein left the table with a little smug look of triumph, and I left chuckling.

The Snow

So yesterday it snowed. I know that for some, this is an everyday winter occurrence. For us, it’s not. We are lucky to get snow, and even luckier if it sticks. It’s unheard of to be able to actually have enough snow to really play in.

The bad parent

Last night, our Filipino neighbors had a birthday party for their son, who was turning 12. They also have a little girl who is 5 or 6, and my boys are over at their house to play several days a week. The party ran from about 5PM to past midnight. There was a huge crowd of people and a bunch of kids running around like crazy. And there was food. Piles and piles of authentic Filipino food. It was delicioso. B asked me later if I realized that we were the only white people there. I didn’t. I was too busy inhaling lumpia.

Anyway, their kids are mega spoiled. The boy plays video games 24/7 and must own every game ever made, by the way that Einstein talks about it. Just the same, the little girl has just about everything any female child could ever dream of. Their house is also filled with junk food. Pop tarts and microwave popcorn and chips and soda and juice drinks. Obviously, my kids think they are the coolest parents around.

Last night at the party, we were speaking with the mother. We asked her if they always have a huge party for their son’s birthday. She said that no, this was the first time. And then she said, “Usually we just buy him whatever he wants. But this year there was nothing left that he wanted. He just sits in front of the TV all day anyway.” Then she shrugged. There wasn’t even a hint of guilt in her voice. It’s as if she was proud of herself, of her boy that is losing valuable brain cells every second that he wastes away with a controller in his hand. I was shocked. Neither B nor I had any idea what to say in response, so we just smiled politely and the subject was quickly changed.

This morning, all Einstein has talked about is video games and about how many things our neighbors have that we don’t. It’s really getting to me. My child is becoming materialistic and being brainwashed by commercialism and I feel like there’s nothing I can do to stop it. The history of video games in our house has been nothing but struggle. A few years back, B’s cousin donated his Playstation 2 and all of his games to my boys. We had so much fun with it at first. The time was always limited to one hour per day. But I started to realize that two things were happening. 1. All my kids could talk about were those damn video games. They were obsessed. 2. After playing for their allotted hour, they became cranky and irritable. It just kept getting worse. At first, I took away the games that were rated Teen. There was a huge argument over the Smackdown wrestling game, but we talked our way through it, and replaced it with a rated E game. And still, the problems continued. Finally, I could take no more. I loaded up the PS2, along with every game we owned, and passed it on to my brother.

Well, as you all know, we’re now living with my parents. And my brother. Which means that the video games are back. The situation is made even worse by the fact that our belongings are in storage. And so, the boys play video games. They fight over the games. They whine and complain and freak out when their time is up. They get bored easily. They talk about nothing except game strategies. They ask how they can earn money to buy the next game. As soon as they have $6 and some change, they buy a used game and play it to death. They write down nothing but games on their Christmas wish lists. When friends come over to play, they immediately want to go downstairs to turn on the Playstation. Same thing when they visit their friends. What is the point of a playdate if it’s with a playSTATION?

The whole situation is giving me grief. I feel like I’m the only parent who gives a shit that we’re encouraging our children to rot their brains right out of their heads. I feel like the bad parent. I always feel like the bad parent! I feel like I will never be able to teach my kids to enjoy life, to cherish the simple, when everyone else is pushing them to consume.

Boys and their toys (or TP tubes in this case)

Here’s proof that little boys will fashion guns out of anything they can get their hands on.

I’m going to Disneyland

It finally happened, people. I won the lottery. And not just any lottery, the INTERNATIONAL lottery. Oh yes, I know you’ve never heard of this before. Neither had I. Until I got my email and follow up letter stating that I had won $500,000. All I have to do is contact an agent at MegaWin International and give them my bank account information. Then I cash the $4000 check they’ve sent me, and I’m off to Disneyland! Oh, and they did specifically say that I was to keep this information confidential. But I just couldn’t help myself. I had to brag to all of you. How lucky am I?!


Here’s a picture of Animal eating his very first Krispy Kreme doughnut.

I really *am* health conscious, I swear I am.