This is how weird my family is

Today we went grocery shopping as a family, minus Pigpen. It’s always nice to keep Pigpen away from the grocery, considering the child has a bottomless pit for a stomach and will ask for every food item in the store, even after repeatedly being warned against it.

Einstein had a few bucks burning a hole in his pocket since, like myself, he is all about instant gratification. Saving money=torture.

We get to the Asian aisle, where B stops and wanders every damn time we go shopping. He’s always buying these disgusting rice crackers wrapped in seaweed. Sometimes he purchases these dehydrated mini sardines and pops them into his mouth like candy while he’s watching the Discovery channel.

Today, he discovers a new product and Einstein is fascinated. It looks like this:


Oh yes, those are actually real mini crabs in a bag. And yes, they do say “Let’s Party!” (What’s a party without crabs in a bag??) From what I hear they are crunchy, coated in sesame seeds, and sickly sweet. They weren’t a big hit. Apparently they taste and smell like a fish that has been rotting away underneath a fishing dock. You have no idea how sick and wrong it was to watch my husband and offspring ingest these suckers. I’d rather eat my own feces. No joke.

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