Saltshaker confusion?

My mother has a cupboard in her dining room that is filled to the brim with fragile items such as vases, plates, and wine glasses. Among the rubble you will find two very small, antique salt shakers.

Animal has been fascinated with this cabinet for months. At first, I thought the fascination was stemming from the fact that it’s one of the only cupboards in the house that isn’t secured with a childproof lock. However, we’ve finally figured it out.

Every time he sneaks into the dining room, he very calmly opens the cupboard door, and carefully selects the salt shakers. Now, this in itself is a miracle, since Animal amongst breakables is much like a bull in a china shop. However, no matter where these objects are located on the shelves, the choice always remains the same.

The next matter of business is to remove the pacifier that occupies his mouth for 22 hours per day. And then, the salt shakers get double fisted and one of them is prompty placed into the mouth and suckled.

Wonder why?

On related matters, Animal has also learned to recognize the word we use for breastfeeding. This word is “milky.” I’m not quite sure how this term came into existence. If I were to wager a guess, I’d say that it originated as a combination of “nursie” and “milk.” Regardless, he is now able to hear anyone speak the word “milky” from a one mile radius and he will frantically come running for it.

Strangely enough, he has also formed a new obsession for a book about Jack & The Beanstalk. It seems rather odd, considering that this book is probably more age appropriate for a 5 or 6 year old. Nevertheless, he brings the book to me at least 15 times a day and smacks me with it until I take it from his hand and begin to read. In the book, Jack’s cow is named “Milky White.” It took me quite some time to realize that whenever I read about “Milky White”, Animal would ferociously grab my breasts and begin to squeeze and grunt impatiently. And come to think of it, I wonder if he actually brings me this book in an attempt to communicate that he wants to nurse? Either way, we’re well into the weaning process, and because of this, the entire household has been warned against uttering the word “milky” and Jack’s cow has been renamed “Mr. M.”

P.S. I just read this blog aloud before posting and guess who’s super spidey senses heard me muttering under my breath and came running once he heard the “m” word? Bah.

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